When we found out we were pregnant for the second time, we both thought the baby would be a boy. We really didn't even consider much that it would be a girl. When we found out she was a girl, there was a moment of sadness for me (it was almost like we'd "lost" the boy that we'd been talking about and imagining for 4 months!) and then all I could think about was how great it would be for them growing and how close they'd be. I instantly pictured them going shopping and out to lunch when they're mamas, sitting by the fire in lounge pants with glasses of wine and talking late into the night and sharing laughter and tears.
I know all too well that not all sisters have this special kind of bond. I've seen (and experienced) it first hand. My sister and I are 8 years apart. Maybe it's because we didn't live in the same house growing up or because we were always at different points in our lives, but sadly, we don't have the closest relationship. We love each other, but aren't close. I can't help but think that part of the reason may be because we don't have the same mom. We missed out on doing girly things together (shopping/lunch/baking/crafting).
I look forward to these things with them, but it also adds some pressure! I know that they'll have their issues through their teen years, but I SO BADLY want them to be really close as they grow up and especially when they're grown. It's something that I make a concious effort to foster on a regular basis.
From the time I was pregnant, Lucy was Stella's baby. We often talk about how one of her most important jobs is to always be sure Lucy is taken care of and protected (we'll have the same conversations with Lu someday). We always talk about how they'll always be there for each other and be each other's biggest supporters. As they get older, both Jim and I will have special days with them together to try to encourage them to have fun together and to be friends.
Lucy is getting more fun to play with all of the time now and we're all loving it! The other morning Stella, Lucy and I were up in Stella's room. Stella started pushing Lucy back onto the bed saying, "I'm gonna take you down!" I was about to stop her but Lucy was squealing with delight! They did this repeatedly for about 10 minutes and I just sat watching with a smile on my face.
I know they're little, but they are so crazy about each other, it makes my heart sing! I was so worried about jealousy issues before Lucy was born but much to our surprise there hasn't been any of that. I feel so blessed that I get to watch the relationship grow and to have been chosen to be in their lives.
What do you think? Any tips on fostering bonds? Am I putting more pressure on myself than I should? It's one of my biggest Mama goals!